It took me several days to comment because this post stirred up so many emotions for me.
In my old church (no longer a church but a congregation!) I served as a worship associate. We had long discussions in person and on email about what we would say in the "welcome" part of the service. There was a script that grew and grew to incorporate recognition of more identities. Most important to other WAs was making atheists feel welcome, to the point that a belief in God was assumed to be rare and believers were almost an afterthought. Then the welcome grew in all the identities someone might have. The leader of the membership committee wanted us to announce how you could join the congregation and get involved.
Meanwhile, when you come to the front door on Sunday morning you have to get through a gaggle of people who know each other well and are warmly greeting each other, catching up, etc. You have to work your way through to get to the door. I've experienced this at other UU churches too, which is a reason I haven't joined a church in my new community.
There is a good chance that the service theme is going to be insider: honoring the religious education volunteers, a guest speaker with a political call to action, reflections on life experiences of individual members, reviewing the issues facing the congregation at its annual meeting, report on GA, youth doing Coming of Age presentations, etc. Sacred music is considered too "god-y" so the music is usually an anthem from a Broadway musical and/or a pop song.
This congregation is located within a few blocks of two major hospitals, and I've encountered many people coming to church to deal with their grief at something that is happening at the hospital to someone they love; I remember one couple who came to our church because their son had just died at the hospital and they needed a place to be. Many others come to church because they are seeking comfort, solace, wisdom, and holiness. I don't think anyone goes to a new church looking for a performance by amateurs or a travelogue. Those things happen at community centers, YMCAs, and junior college auditoriums. I often say that I don't want to go to the Democratic Club on Sunday mornings!
UUs often wonder why more Black and Latino people don't come to our churches. I remember a Black man who arrived carrying a well-worn leather-covered Bible because he saw that Emerson's Self-Reliance was the sermon topic. I spoke with him before the service and he told me that Emerson was an important guide in his life and he was interested in a religion that honored Emerson. He never returned.
In my many years at that congregation I took it upon myself to engage softly with new people before the service, help them find a place to sit (luckily we still had pews) and find out what brought them to church. Almost everyone was carrying a heavy burden that they hoped would be eased in a Sunday church service.
Unitarian Universalism could be the next great religion and I think the denomination understands this; I stayed with the church because my pre-pandemic trips to General Assembly were always a source of deep inspiration for me. The congregational structure demonstrates the deep challenges of democracy that push us toward the "lowest common denominator" and exclude those who may differ with the majority on matters of faith and politics. People come to church seeking something more than they can get in non-religious community programs, and they often come with a broken heart. If we don't have room for them, they won't be back. How sad that our congregations are "the antithesis of welcoming".
It took me several days to comment because this post stirred up so many emotions for me.
In my old church (no longer a church but a congregation!) I served as a worship associate. We had long discussions in person and on email about what we would say in the "welcome" part of the service. There was a script that grew and grew to incorporate recognition of more identities. Most important to other WAs was making atheists feel welcome, to the point that a belief in God was assumed to be rare and believers were almost an afterthought. Then the welcome grew in all the identities someone might have. The leader of the membership committee wanted us to announce how you could join the congregation and get involved.
Meanwhile, when you come to the front door on Sunday morning you have to get through a gaggle of people who know each other well and are warmly greeting each other, catching up, etc. You have to work your way through to get to the door. I've experienced this at other UU churches too, which is a reason I haven't joined a church in my new community.
There is a good chance that the service theme is going to be insider: honoring the religious education volunteers, a guest speaker with a political call to action, reflections on life experiences of individual members, reviewing the issues facing the congregation at its annual meeting, report on GA, youth doing Coming of Age presentations, etc. Sacred music is considered too "god-y" so the music is usually an anthem from a Broadway musical and/or a pop song.
This congregation is located within a few blocks of two major hospitals, and I've encountered many people coming to church to deal with their grief at something that is happening at the hospital to someone they love; I remember one couple who came to our church because their son had just died at the hospital and they needed a place to be. Many others come to church because they are seeking comfort, solace, wisdom, and holiness. I don't think anyone goes to a new church looking for a performance by amateurs or a travelogue. Those things happen at community centers, YMCAs, and junior college auditoriums. I often say that I don't want to go to the Democratic Club on Sunday mornings!
UUs often wonder why more Black and Latino people don't come to our churches. I remember a Black man who arrived carrying a well-worn leather-covered Bible because he saw that Emerson's Self-Reliance was the sermon topic. I spoke with him before the service and he told me that Emerson was an important guide in his life and he was interested in a religion that honored Emerson. He never returned.
In my many years at that congregation I took it upon myself to engage softly with new people before the service, help them find a place to sit (luckily we still had pews) and find out what brought them to church. Almost everyone was carrying a heavy burden that they hoped would be eased in a Sunday church service.
Unitarian Universalism could be the next great religion and I think the denomination understands this; I stayed with the church because my pre-pandemic trips to General Assembly were always a source of deep inspiration for me. The congregational structure demonstrates the deep challenges of democracy that push us toward the "lowest common denominator" and exclude those who may differ with the majority on matters of faith and politics. People come to church seeking something more than they can get in non-religious community programs, and they often come with a broken heart. If we don't have room for them, they won't be back. How sad that our congregations are "the antithesis of welcoming".