Things that have been on my mind a lot lately:
That Brené Brown thing about belonging versus fitting in? Still on my mind, still important to consider, especially as we think about growth, membership, and stewardship.
Please don’t approach your minister or other service leader with non-urgent non-worship issues within a half hour of the service starting. They are (a) focusing on that sacred hour and (b) won’t remember anything you said. I promise you it’s not you - it’s the focus required for that work.
Institutions are made by people. People are fallible; ergo, institutions are fallible. And yes, I’m talking about all of us. Please show some grace.
It’s okay if you came to a congregation seeking safety, comfort, and healing - and found out that it also offers (and asks for) accountability, challenging, and growing. It doesn’t mean the faith left you, it means the faith has met you where you were and now calls you to keep going.
If you’re upset by something in a worship service, please sit on it for 24 hours and then write or call the preacher. You might find that what you might say in the moment is not what you actually mean to say, or that it requires more space than the receiving line. As Parker Palmer writes, “when the going gets tough, turn to wonder.” And remember that people don’t remember the hundred praises; they remember the one criticism.
You can actually ask for what you need without whining about it, or doing the “people are saying” thing.
There is no such thing as salvation by governance.
Communication matters, but it has to be understood too. If someone doesn’t comprehend you, it’s just silent chaos.
From Nicola Jane Hobbs: “Instead of asking, ‘Have I worked hard enough to deserve to rest?’ I’ve started asking, ‘Have I rested enough to do my most living, meaningful work?’”
Your most important survival skill is asking for help.
And finally, a reminder that there will be no HMC for the next couple of weeks, as I’m off to rest and explore. Be excellent to each other.
All. Of. This! Thank you Reverend Kimberley Debus. 💛